A children's picture book, 480 words in length, HIS EMINENCE SHAN'T ATTEND is a limerick tale as told from an outsider's pirate perspective. The story follows a young adventurer named Sissy Swashbuckle who desires to share her various tales of exploration with someone she greatly admires: His Eminence. Each of Sissy's repeated invitations, however, is returned stating that "His Eminence Shan't Attend". Her perseverance pays off in the end, when differences are compromised for the sake of ultimately sharing stories of Sissy's fanciful excursions.
This is a story of tolerance, persistence, understanding variances in "taste," and coming together across the table, while specifically encouraging the explorative nature of young girls.